A False Idea of Permanence

Faith belongs to the one who asks, because the one who asks receives. Often we beat ourselves up thinking, “I’ve been through worse and overcome it. Why am I so terrified? Seriously you’re better than this.” 

The reality is on our own we are capable of nothing, in every moment of triumph stood before us a God who is greater than it all. In every moment of doubt and fear stood an outstretched hand of divine love. Through every storm it was Him who gave you the great gift of faith. It’s that gift of faith that compelled the disciples, young men heading into the peaks of their careers, to leave it all behind and follow Christ. It was the same gift they lacked due to their pride that led them to despair at sea. Yet in finding it again it led them to martyrdom. As I prepare to leave for NY and the doubts and fears rush through my mind I think I’m giving all I have. What more can I give? And He looks to me and says ask and you shall receive. He never asked me to slave myself over. He never asked me to be everything for everyone. He never asked me to steer the ship and take control. All He wants is for me to surrender. To trust that He will keep me safe and provide all that I need. It’s scary moving to a place I’ve never been, to an address I still haven’t been given. I’m sad to leave my family, my boyfriend, and friends. But there’s someone going through worse who doesn’t even know that God is at their side. Yes the next few pages of my life feel like I’m jumping into blank spaces, but if God is there that’s where I’ll be. Faith is what gives me the strength to turn the page. 

This is why faith is so important. We must continue to ask for it no matter where we are on our journey. The storms of life constantly come and go, but God is always with us. It’s when we forget that God is with us and for us that we lose that faith. When we lose our faith we quite literally feel like we are drowning. That there’s not a soul out there who understands or cares about the chaos in our hearts. We suffocate in fear and anxiety because every ounce of suffering feels like it’s all for nothing. 

Maybe  you’re thinking well I believe God’s real, I’m praying, I’m doing the things. But love is not a checklist people. Love is a constant being. Like if ‘is’ing was a word that’s what it would be (that’s a whole other tangent). But if love is constant what it takes to believe and surrender to that is faith. Faith says abide. Faith says He is God, and I am His. 

When the Bible says, “Faith, Hope, and Love remain and the greatest of these is love”. It never says yeah forget faith. Faith is so important and you have to have it or this world and it’s demons will eat you up.

You’re one simple task is this. Pray. Which literally means to ask. Ask God for that precious gift of faith. For worry has never added even a second to your lifetime, but faith has added infinity. So in the face of the storm what will you choose?

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